Most people have at least two voices, often competing ones. We have internal debate. We have the “little voice in my head,” and we have “me”.
The “me” is the Big Me. The one that others see, the one that takes action, makes speeches, plans practices and leads the team.
Little Me is the internal Me, the one that has doubts, or, sometimes, confidence; the one who wonders if that is a good idea, who tells us we might not be good enough.
For many of us, the Little Me is too often a negative voice, the one that says, “this might not work”.
This JV me often holds us back. Don’t let the little me have too much control. Be honest with yourself.
Is “Common Wisdom” simply a self-fulfilling prophecy? Can we simply make something–especially something bad–happen just by expecting it?
Or, perhaps, there IS a wizard behind the curtain who makes sure that things come to fruition when we say that they will!
Many of us fall prey to the “that’s just the way it is” mentality when we allow ourselves to underperform. The idea that we simply don’t have the time, money or other resources to do what we’d like to do…that’s too easy in my book.
Coach, you choose what to pay attention to. You can make different choices.
Things are generally not predetermined.
Find a way to be your own Wizard.
Things are not getting done well, games are being lost or played poorly, your business or team culture is not moving you forward…but at least you have your health.
This phrase is also commonly expressed as, “it’s not like it’s life or death…”.
These are excuses of the highest order. What do those statements actually mean in this context? What does death have to do with it? Mostly it’s a way of finding something–anything–positive in a crappy situation.
The reality is that saying these things does not make you feel better, but you can pretend it does. It’s a way of taking something totally irrelevant and giving it importance so that the failures are minimized.
It’s a coverup.
Of course your life and your health–and that of those around you–is important. The sentiment is real, but not in the context of a coaching or team failure. It’s the failure itself that you should be examining and celebrating as a catalyst.
Do the challenging work of planning, working the plan and then assessing the result, and get to work on making a better plan, or improving the execution. The PEAR process is a crucial, underutilized tool for improvement. Stay away from the coverup.