Do we really need to find our passion? Or, even a passion at all? Is this a requirement for happiness as much of the world is telling us?
If we’re supposed to have a passion and we don’t feel as if we do, does that mean we are a failure? Does it mean anything? (While I’m at it, is “meaning” really all that important?)
I say be passionate about the thing or things that fuel you passionate bones at the time. Be where you are and do that thing really well…be that person at a high level.
When we take a deep breath and work to be our best current selves I believe we make ourselves and others better without even trying to be something or someone in the future.
If you are currently dissatisfied, what’s the downside to making changes?
There are a lot of reasons why we don’t change. Mostly they have to do with fear.
We fear losing standing or losing face if we admit weakness, and change is seen as admitting weakness, a fact that makes no sense yet consumes us in many areas. What if we change and lose a game? On the way to improvement we may be seen as “less than”, somehow.
But, if you’re currently not happy with the situation, you are already “less than” a future you may be able to create.
Why not make a change?
What if you did the work to know what was truly important to you?
What if you saw all of your actions thru a lens of the values you believe deeply in? What if you really knew what those were?
What if you worked hard to really value the impact of your actions based upon higher values that winning and losing? It might work.
Keep doing, and work harder on being.
“Learning from the past” should not be a random thing. We should have a planning process, make and execute plans and look at them after they are executed. Ask, “What worked?”, and do more of that and less of what didn’t work.
When someone says they learned their lesson, it’s often simply because a thing didn’t work out, and not often enough because we took the time to review our plans and our actions.
Take time more often to learn–the good and the bad–intentionally.
One of the conversations that has stuck with me for over ten years…
“Coach, I figured something out,” she said one April morning. “I’m so used to coaches being the one who yelled at us and made us run, I never thought of them as being on the same team as us.”
She was shocked when she felt support from her college coach.
It’s doubtful that all of her coaches before that were “against” her and her teammates, or that yelling was the top activity.
Yet, she FELT that way…the prevailing FEELING about coaches was of being criticized, “yelled at”, even if voices weren’t raised, and of being on the other side.
Recognize how people feel in your presence. Your words may not be as important as you think.
When something goes wrong we often ask a version of this question: “why did they do that?”
This speaks to intention, that the person planned to screw it up, the “why?” implying that they wanted to make a bad decision. Of course, sabotage might be in play, but usually it’s a given that the person was not motivated to do things poorly.
Errors of all kinds come from a lot of angles. Typically, lack of focus or attention to detail, lack of skill, or poor preparation.
Coaches should understand this and teach focus in addition to skill and strategy, and look to ourselves to ask how we can better prepare our people.
There is no such thing as “not doing anything wrong” on a team or at work. If someone is saying that, they’re probably doing something wrong.
If you are not giving, you are taking away. Energy is a zero sum game.
When you answer, “it’s going”, or “as good as can be expected,” when asked how you are, you are violating the No Neutral rule.
Be mindful of your projected energy.