Share. Try things, make plans, try things, make notes, try things, write lists…and share.
None of us own coaching technique. Even the most novel strategies come from seeds of something that’s comes before.
It’s so exciting to share coaching ideas, sketches, failures and successes through stories and game plans executed or trashed. The idea of “talking coaching” is the way to the future for all of us.
Let’s not just hash through the hows and even the whys of our experiences, but share the this-is-how-i-got-there details. You have lots to give and there are lots of coaches out there who can learn from your experiences.
What you did as a performer today is who you are as a performer, today.
Right now, as one who’s working to execute a program, project or skill at a certain level, you are the level you achieve.
It matters not how hard you have worked to this point, nor how much talent you have; you are what you’ve done.
So, make a plan for improving the skill and working the work and see what you can do the next time out.
Lots of people are talking about presence and being fully in the place where you actually are.
I once heard Ellen Degeneres comment something like, “If your body is doing something, your brain ought to be in on it.”
I call it being where your feet are.
And, it’s becoming harder to do, to truly focus on one thing at a time, so the old standby intentionality comes into play as the main event.
Intent to be attentive can be a struggle for me, but I’m thankful for the continued chances to improve at it.
The idea that something “saved your life”…
Is living simply not being dead? Really, I’m asking.
If someone or something–a drug or a good samaritan–came upon you just in the nick of time to keep you from death, you’re life has been saved.
But what then?
“Living well” means a variety of things to various people and societies. I think we all should think more intentionally about what good living is for us and set out to achieve those things.
Just showing up each day is too easy and holds opportunity costs. We, I, can do more.
So. Many. Distractions.
So many good ideas all around us.
So many people have thought of so many things one could do, or say, or even be! How can we possibly keep up?
Start by writing your own stuff. Just think, then write. Then revise, and write some more.
Even if you don’t want to write…start with the thinking. If you did have your own system, your own great ideas, what would they be?
Good coaching, is two things, IMO:
Find out what’s required for success (define that, too) and what drives people (especially yourself).
Then boil down all of the things that your team will need to achieve the standards you decide upon, be clear about what’s expected along the way, and get going.
Start with a notebook and an open heart.
Most situations are not like arithmetic. Here there are right answers that can fairly easily be deduced. 2 + 3? Easy.
These types of problems are not interesting, and won’t stimulate you or your organization to move toward “better”.
It’s the interesting problems that move us along; it’s the noodling on things is really where the work gets done.
How often have you started to think or talk (usually we’re talking more than thinking) about one topic and come out the other side making moves about something completely different. It’s the process of consideration that makes the difference.
So, by taking problems away from people and offering easy solutions or giving away answers without asking for any work we’re doing a disservice to the world.
Ask hard questions of yourself and those around you and watch how the thinking makes progress.
Plain old stink. It’s painful.
Those who can find the good in the suck are plentiful, and I admire that. And, sometimes there isn’t any silver lining.
And that’s ok, too.
Being able to both feel the pain and get past it (not get over it, just past) is not always easy but, as always, time doesn’t care about your pain.
Keep working. Have a system that doesn’t get derailed by failure. Otherwise you don’t really have a system.
Who’s listening to you? Do you have a place to vent that’s productive for you? What is productive, anyway?
I say go for it. Vent away!
While you’re there, listen for the undercurrents (or ask someone to listen to/for you) of what’s really going on. What does this rant say about what you value, what you really care about.
The clues are in there. Just like the world is asking us to slow down and listen to others, let’s practice intentionally listening to ourselves.