Coaches are wired to fix things.
This idea is built on the premise that these things are broken. What if we were to turn that negative viewpoint into one that emphasizes growing, expanding or simply clarifying the system, person or situation in question?
Does your team need fixing? Maybe, but perhaps not…or perhaps some areas need fine-tuning more than a significant overhaul. As we look for the areas of struggle–because we like fixing–we often miss out on opportunities to make our strengths even better.
Find an edge to sharpen.
Share. Try things, make plans, try things, make notes, try things, write lists…and share.
None of us own coaching technique. Even the most novel strategies come from seeds of something that’s comes before.
It’s so exciting to share coaching ideas, sketches, failures and successes through stories and game plans executed or trashed. The idea of “talking coaching” is the way to the future for all of us.
Let’s not just hash through the hows and even the whys of our experiences, but share the this-is-how-i-got-there details. You have lots to give and there are lots of coaches out there who can learn from your experiences.
What you did as a performer today is who you are as a performer, today.
Right now, as one who’s working to execute a program, project or skill at a certain level, you are the level you achieve.
It matters not how hard you have worked to this point, nor how much talent you have; you are what you’ve done.
So, make a plan for improving the skill and working the work and see what you can do the next time out.
You’re busy. You’ve got a lot going on. You might have time next week…
Are the things on your to-do list weighing you down or are the providing an anchor that helps you to get things done?
Finding systems to do “the things” the way you’d like them to be done, in a repeatable fashion, is probably a good thing, and for sure examination of the system itself is important.
Start by making note of what you’d like the future to look like and go from there.
I love the simplicity of Dr. Phil’s primary question,
“how’s that working out for you?”.
Really, how’s are your decisions impacting your life?
We make lots of decisions, chose to go right or left, stay home or go out, send the runner or play it safe…yet we often think that the things that happen to us are random.
It’s not a knock on you to ask how it’s going, it’s simply an honest ask. What’s your current situation and how do you feel?
How are things going for you? What’s “working out” in your favor, and what seems to be holding you back.
Ask. Ask again. Be honest.
You might as well be on the change train since you know it’s going to happen.
Look for the bumps as well as the forks in the road, prepare to zig even when you expect to zag.
Nothing stays the same regarding systems, processes or outcomes.
You can make intentional changes, or the unexpected might happen.
Prepare all of “you”, your levels of resilience as well as the level of detail of your planning. Being ready doesn’t just mean having an emergency plan, it means having the peace of mind that you can face any option.
So often I hear people complain about their poor time management skills. First, this is a personal problem.
Why complain about something that’s 100% in your control? Even if time management were a thing, why wouldn’t one work to make their skills better rather than spend time complaining about them?
So I’m on a crusade to make the phrase be self-management rather than time management.
I got stuck in traffic and that made me mad.
That player isn’t working hard and that’s why I’m being a jerk to everyone else.
The sunrise made me happy.
Nope. It’s your brain at work, doing so many magical things on the inside.
There’s no “making” you feel anything.
Simply by recognizing that how you feel is not the other guys’ issue and owning the ability to not feel that way (no one is saying it’s easy) is powerful.
Working to recognize when you feel badly, or guilty, or stressed or any other sort of upset and embracing those feelings rather than pushing them away may help bring them down a couple of notches.
Lots of people are talking about presence and being fully in the place where you actually are.
I once heard Ellen Degeneres comment something like, “If your body is doing something, your brain ought to be in on it.”
I call it being where your feet are.
And, it’s becoming harder to do, to truly focus on one thing at a time, so the old standby intentionality comes into play as the main event.
Intent to be attentive can be a struggle for me, but I’m thankful for the continued chances to improve at it.
I think that ID’ing and owning, defining and providing others clarity on one’s core values is really important. An organization can move forward, with its people on the same mission, when the central ideas are clear.
I don’t think “accountability” should be one of them.
Once your values and expected behaviors are articulated, then accountability comes into play.
Are you doing what you said you would?
That’s accountability – it’s an outcome, not a seed to be planted. It’s an expectation, but not a behavior in an of itself.