Oh yeah, everyone thinks that’s the right thing to do.
Everyone says it’s true.
I’ll get everyone together and we’ll get it done.
Is “everyone” really all of the people? Who’s important, and who is optional to be in the group of everyone?
If you need everyone on board you better be sure that everyone knows what’s happening. And if you don’t need everyone then just ask the people who are crucial.
Today I asked a college coach in her 3rd year as a head coach what she thinks departments should do to help first year HCs?
“What do you wish had happened?”, that first year, I asked her.
I wish that it was not optional to have regularly scheduled coaching sessions.
I needed help that I didn’t even know about.
I needed someone to ask me questions and reflect my answers.
I wish I had a chance to ask about the mechanics of running a program.
I needed some lessons on head coaching.
Where were we for that coach and the athletes that didn’t get our best product?
So, there is probably a really good way to do the thing that you need to do. Others have done it before, I’m sure, and you can get a lot from their experience.
You can research the best way to do this thing, you can rely on your own experience or you can ask a friend.
In my experience, I find that relying on my own best practices, for that thing or other similar things I’ve done before, is the best way to get a satisfactory result.
If I think about the way I like to do things, the way the best things have worked out for me, I find that there aren’t really an unlimited way to do things…
So, do something, see how it feels when it’s done, redo it, and go from there.
The best way to practice, is to practice.
What if that was the question we asked?
How can I help other guy?
What does this kid need from me as a coach? What am I going to do to move this situation forward?
We all have a narrative about what’s ok and what’s not, who is “good” and who’s not, but how often do we think about what’s actually best for the other guy? Now.
Of course what’s best for the team might be different. Then the questions change.
Remember that time…? It seems like it was easy, right? You showed up and got it right.
Your successes are likely more complex than you remember them.
You worked hard, you considered options that ended up on the cutting room floor that you don’t even recall now.
Sometimes we think our former selves had it easier, or the competition wasn’t as tough as it actually was, or we were just better then…
Give yourself credit and get to work on the complex concern in front of you now.
Your story is what others are telling themselves about you.
You are being your story. You are to others what you do, how you show up each day, what you bring to the table for them.
What you say is not who you are.
Are you one with yourself? Do you know who you are and what you care about?
Can you answer that about your team?
How do you talk about yourself and the relationships you have both to yourself and to those involved?
Do you take time to answer these things on paper?
You’ll find that clarity rolls right out of your pen. Try it.
I like to provide assessments to projects. Set goals, make a plan to achieve them, get to work and then see how you do.
Yet I wonder if we need to add a quality definition to everything? Is a rating always important?
Do we need to know how our day was in relation to yesterday or a week from now, every day?
Maybe we can let ourselves off the hook one day at a time.
These are not the good old days.
That big trip, that championship, that opportunity…it’s only going to present itself once!
Are you sure? If a thing is that great perhaps we’d like to work hard to be sure we can do it/feel it/have it/be it more often.
Let’s put the good stuff on repeat!